I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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