its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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