Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
