i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
