Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
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