you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BRING THE BAGELS
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize