WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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