At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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