Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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