oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I have fence marks all over my body
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize