Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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