I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I don't think brook has ever known best
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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