i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Randomize
