I saw his package. It spoke to me.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
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