This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
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