i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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