this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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