what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Randomize
