just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
