D3 body, D1 cock
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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