you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
