Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
my mouth tastes like poor choices
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize