Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
we're making bets on your personal life
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
this is an emotional support booty call
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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