you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
