I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
God I need to hump something, right now.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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