you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
