I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
