why didn't you poke me back
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize