so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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