What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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