I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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