it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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