My boss' voice literally gives me gas
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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