butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
