This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize