She said her name was "party"
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
