garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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