for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
