remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize