I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.