Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize