im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
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