yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
its liver damage thursday
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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