I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
There was a lot of him and a little penis
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
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Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
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My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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