Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
