Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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