Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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