hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize