Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
