I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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