She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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