You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
